A lot of people are facing the problem of how to make their long distance relationship work. Long distance relationships are definitely risky, and if you are unfortunate enough to be far away from your significant other, the prospect of potentially ruining your relationship can seem daunting. Just because long distance relationships are difficult, doesn’t mean they’re impossible. Simple adjustments to your attitude and lifestyle can help you keep your loved one in your life.
Understand what you have. Ask the important questions right away to make sure you are both clear on the nature of the relationship. Naming your relationship (dating, seeing each other, boyfriend-girlfriend, engaged) as well as defining exclusivity (limited to one person) can be difficult and awkward questions to ask, but will save you great heartache and misunderstanding down the line. Stating your end goals and expectations will allow you both to work together to build the relationship you want.
Be positive. Staying positive and not focusing on the negative aspects of a long-distance relationship is essential to keeping your relationship blooming. Being away from your sweetie is not all bad news. Use the opportunity of personal time to pursue your interests and hobbies as well as your career objectives. Another positive point is that long distance dating pushes both of you to be more creative, to communicate better since you don’t have “face-to-face” time and to test (and express) your feelings.
Communicate in some way every day, more than once if possible. Since you won’t be seeing each other, it’s important to establish and maintain an emotional connection. These don’t always have to be long, in-depth conversations. Tell each other about your little triumphs and tragedies. Ask on for advice. Use an instant messenger program or VoIP for real-time chat, or web cams for that visual connection. E-mail is great, so make sure you use it, especially if long-distance phone calls put a strain on your budget. Ensure the e-mails are substantive and detailed. It will show that you care enough to put in the time and effort.
Work around your schedule. Do your best to maintain communication, even if one of you gets busier than the other. If you are the busy one, warn your partner that you may have limited time, and try to send at least a quick email or text, or a share a brief phone call. If you are the not-as-busy person, take advantage of the time by picking up a new hobby, getting in shape, reading a new book, etc. Flexibility is very important.
Visit often. Try to make the time to visit each other as often as possible or as often as your budget permits. A relationship cannot thrive if the only thing you have is the phone call. You need to see each other in person at every opportunity. Visit on a regular schedule if you can
Create trust. Just as with traditional relationships, trust is incredibly important. Avoid temptations. Try your best to be faithful, lest you destroy the trust on which your relationship relies. Avoid putting yourself in situations where you would be tempted, and let your partner know that there’s nothing to worry about. *Don’t be too anxious or jealous if you don’t always know what they are doing. A little space is harmless and will definitely keep things calm.